I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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