i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Randomize
