Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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