im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
