and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Randomize
