Heybabeimwearingurpanties
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
