I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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