I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
Randomize
