your thong is hanging out like whoa
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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