Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(586): View more from Michigan

A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women

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(206): View more from Washington

would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?

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(813): View more from Florida

watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide

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(660): View more from Missouri

We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out

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(818): View more from California

He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.

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(503): View more from Oregon

I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.

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(518): View more from New York

I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.

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(479): View more from Arkansas

Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?

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(214): View more from Texas

come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals

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