He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Randomize
