so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
She's not a foreskin expert like you
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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