you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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