she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
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You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
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Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
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