new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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