like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Just sold all of my pants in order to buy tonight's whiskey. Goodbye, high functioning alcoholism. Hello, Dad.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Randomize
