dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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