My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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