the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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