they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
