oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Randomize