I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Randomize
