I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
