dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
you never un-have a 4some
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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