I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
