Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize