You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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