Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize