I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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