i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize