it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
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