due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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