bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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