What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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