And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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