You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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