What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
