Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Randomize
