Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Randomize
