Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize