i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
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Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
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