i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
