Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
