i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
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