Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
