My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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