I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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