i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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