I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
