my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Randomize
