TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Randomize
